FIRST RIDE ✦ VIDEO / ACTION [GOLDENROD CITY]

[diamondo]

[ VIDEO ]

Alright, I've got a question to those of you who've been here awhile. Why the fuck doesn't the Game Corner boot minors out?

[Mondo is sitting on a bench somewhere in Goldenrod City, looking a bit irritated. Sitting beside him is a Riolu, kicking his feet and staring at the 'Gear like it's the most interesting thing he's ever seen.]

I thought I was getting away with getting in 'cause I look like an adult, but I swear to fucking God I saw a kid in there today! They didn't kick 'em out either! The fuck is wrong with this place? Kids aren't supposed to be allowed to gamble like that!

[Clearly he's only mad because he thought he was breaking the law and sticking it to the man or whatever. Turns out he wasn't. Whoops.]

While we're at it, what all can you get from the Game Corner, Pokémon-wise? I wanna see if there's anything there worth trying to get. Probably not, but it's worth a shot, right?

[Mondo motions for the camera-mon to cut it there, but instead it keeps rolling.]

Fuck, what am I gonna do with all these coins if there ain't anything I want there? Just fucking give 'em away? Seems like a waste--

[And then suddenly a loud cawing sound catches his attention and Mondo is promptly attacked by a bird.]

Fuck!! Get the fuck offa me you son of a--!!

[The bird squawks when Mondo hits it and flies off, carrying Mondo's coin case with it.]

Oh you've gotta be fucking shitting me! Pierce, Ryder, let's go!

[And with that, the feed cuts on Mondo and the Riolu, Pierce, dashing off after the bird.]

[ ACTION - GOLDENROD CITY ]

[If you're in Goldenrod, chances are you'll find Mondo chasing after that pesky Murkrow. Occasionally he'll have Pierce the Riolu aim a Sky Uppercut at it, but it seems the Murkrow is just fast enough to get out of the way. Occasionally the coin case will drop a few coins here and there that Ryder the Scraggy will pick up and stuff in her... uh, pants-pouch-thing.

This ridiculously stupid show will go on for quite some time if it's not interrupted, until Mondo finally seems to realize that the smartest thing to do would be to catch the Murkrow. He finally throws a Pokéball at it and retrieves the Coin Case that it dropped, shoving it in his bag and glowering at the Pokéball.

Much to his displeasure, the ball locks with a click. He's now the not-so-proud owner of a mischievous Murkrow.]

Fucking hell.

Comments

[video]

[no_ufo_ending]

Proobably because kids tend to run off on their own with money. Money they could use. That place is sketchy as hell. When you really think about it, this whole place is. They give ten-year-olds animals that can breathe fire.

[diamondo]

Ten year olds? Are you shitting me? I always thought they were older in the game...

[But how is he supposed to know? He's never played it!]

Fuck, that's messed up. The fuck's wrong with this world? I mean, are kids allowed to fucking drink too?

[no_ufo_ending]

Well, the guy on the TV show was just ten. Surprisingly there actually is an age limit on drinking here. Like the one thing that has one.

[diamondo]

Shit, seriously? Well that's kinda a shame.

[Oh well, back to sneaking drinks it is!]

Can't believe they let fucking ten year olds run around without supervision like that. And out in the wilderness too! This world's fucked up, man.

[no_ufo_ending]

_{[Henry kind of sits back and makes an observation.]}

You're pretty tall. It shouldn't be too much of a problem.

[video]

[ardent]

[oh my god oowada-kun he turns his back for five minutes and -

okay

okay look just

let him turn the device on and really there is only one relevant thing to say to all of that, isn't there]

Aniki, what were you doing in that casino to begin with?!

[diamondo]

Um...

[QUICK MONDO THINK OF SOMETHING!!!]

Just checking it out, that's all!! I just wanted to make sure it wasn't catering to children or anything like that, yep that's definitely all it was!!!

[...wow he is the worst liar.]

[ardent]

[As bad a lie as it is, that actually gets Ishimaru to pause for a moment, though his gaze is still incredibly piercing while he thinks that over.

You had better sell this to him hard - otherwise, on a scale from one to "writing lines until I die"...well. He'll prepare the ice packs for your wrist, buddy, you're going to need them.]

Where did you get all those coins from, then, if you weren't gambling yourself?!

[..........]

Assuming you still have them, that is - that bird...

[diamondo]

You'd be surprised at how many people just drop coins on the floor!

[Hey, that is true! It's just not how he got most of the coins from! That was stealing.]

Don't worry, I caught that fucking bird. ...No, I literally caught it. In a ball. I don't really want it, but I guess I do need another Pokémon...

[And it's a Flying-type, something he doesn't have! That does make three Dark-types though...]

[ardent]

[................]

That may be, but I had better not hear about you going in there again! It's a waste of time and gambling is both wasteful and highly immoral!

[Well, now that that's out of the way.]

As for the bird - maybe it will be useful one day! That gives you four, doesn't it?

[video]

[thevveribest]

Good job on losin' your winnin's, idiot.

But who fuckin' giwes a shit if a kid is gamblin'? Since when has that EWER been a age related thing?

[diamondo]

It's always been an age-related thing! Kids aren't allowed to gamble where I'm from.

And fuck's up with your accent anyway?

[thevveribest]

Pffft, where I'm from, gamblin' is the fuckin' least a worries. Murderin', pillagin', an' the like is far more important than simple gamblin'.

And there ain't nothin' UP with my accent, it's a symbol a my royal status, but I guess a pink-skinned sandlicker like you wouldn't know that, now would you?

[diamondo]

The fuck kinda place do you come from? That sounds fucking awful. And you want me to believe that you're royalty? Yeah right!!

[thevveribest]

It ain't awful! It was awesome! I'm from the planet Alternia, I'm a troll, and I AM royalty! I'm a fuckin' prince, you lowly bloody peasant.

You don't got the right to question the state of my royal status.

[video]

[lieutenantantichrist]

[Did somebody call for a scowling authority figure?]

Damn right. There's something wrong with a place that lets kids gamble away their lunch money at the craps table.

Wait a minute. If you didn't know that, what were you doing in there?

[diamondo]

[Oh no, not an authority figure!!]

What do you think I was doing in there? Gambling! I used to get away with it all the time back home, but shit wasn't legal there.

[He might sound kind of put out.]

[lieutenantantichrist]

[God damn it kid.]

If it wasn't legal, you shouldn't've been doing it! The hell were you thinking?

And while you're at it, don't go announcing it to police officers!

[diamondo]

How was I supposed to know you're a cop? And 'sides, it's not like you can do anything to me anyway.

[Shrug! Look at all the fucks he's not giving!!]

[lieutenantantichrist]

It doesn't matter, you shouldn't be doing it in the first place!

[That hits close to home. There isn't anything Blake can do here, and that never stops irritating him.]

Get a goddamn haircut!

[Video]

[killer_sweets]

You must be fairly new here if you didn't know that. Besides that isn't even that bad compare to how punishment works in this place.

If it will makes you feel better, you can also buy or rent property too no matter what age. I have something setup in Goldenrod, myself.

[diamondo]

Whoa, no way! Really? That's pretty fucking crazy! I guess getting a place would be a good idea...

[It would mean living somewhere that's not underground! Sounds good!]

And what's this 'bout punishment?

[killer_sweets]

Yeah all you need is the money to rent out a place.

There is only one punishment for the crimes done in this place and it's community service. Even then it's if you get arrested, warrents don't last that long in this either.

[diamondo]

...Are you shitting me? That's it? Just community service?

[Holy shit that's awesome. Ishimaru's going to have a heart attack when he hears that, but this is great! Mondo can get away with whatever he wants!]

[killer_sweets]

Totally serious, the police and justice system here are a joke. You get a week or so community service if you get caught doing something else they'll put you in for a bit longer.

[Which would honestly explain why Team Rocket is thriving so well.]